Brain zest, really.
Alot of racket on friends' blogs lately about the wheezing music industry, all its various pitfalls and wrinkles, characters and charlatans, etc. With all due (overdue?) respect to my dear friends, it's all very boring.
An ad I saw on Craigslist today, verbatim (aka cut and pasted), all typos and non-punctuation preserved for your enjoyment:
"Hey whats up, we are looking for a lead guitarsit, someone who would be able to write the lead parts, most of the song writing is done by the lead singer, but we dont mind mixing things up and listening to everyones ideas.
We play music thats somewhat pop punk, indie, and a bit screamo. We have many record company intrests and are working with a studio/ venue/managment agency.
The type of person we hope to find is someone who can practice 3 times a week, someone who is between the ages of 17 to about 20 or 21. Also having skills with a keyboard would be a big bonus, and if you have some singing abilty. Also we do not want someone who is planning to do this for a couple of months, we have many opportunities to make our music come out big, so please only serious and friendly musicians."
Puts me in mind of a remark someone made about me behind my back many years ago, summer of 1989, while camped out on a big rock in British Columbia:
"Yeah, I like Eric OK. He's pretty smart. For a musician..."
To her face, and with utterly undiluted venom, I gleefully raked this person over some very hot coals for that stupid remark. I was only 21, but it was one of my finest oratories ever. "It doesn't matter what you do in life," I probably yelled, "you have to be smart no matter what. If I was not a smart, capable, talented person, never mind being a musician, I wouldn't be perched on this freezing soaking boulder with you, you spoiled little half-witted semi-literate twatty shrew." I might not have said it quite like that, but I like the way it ended up sort of rhyming...
We later shipped her home because she couldn't hack it. I think I scared her. But her remark has stuck with me over the years. As evidenced above, musicians are generally branded among non-musicians as illiterate morons (drummers and viola players), egomaniacal martinets (guitar players and conductors), drooling geek doormats (bass players), primadonna vibrator-up-the-juxie whip-crackers (keyboard folks of every flavor), and, well, losers on their way to the gig, trying to beat the dead frog (french horn, etc). I think that's why my esteemed fellow trench-dwellers have been venting lately.
The music industry is what it is. Agreed, it is unconscionably corrupt. But that's nothing new. Here's the cure as I see it. Invent your own music industry, and just do everything you can to carve out your own little corner of it. Record like mad and make records however you're able, make your own flyers and album covers, do whatever it takes to get it out there. Somebody will like it, and buy it. Learn how to be your own publicist, booker, manager, accountant, producer, engineer. None of it is rocket science. If you happen to get some mailbox money along the way, major bonus points and consider yourself lucky. If you got into this to get rich, you made a big mistake.
Just don't make crap. That's all I ask. If you want to be soaked in ducats in this racket, learn how to "sing" like Celine Dion, and then never talk to me again.
A very fun show at the Red Devil last night. Oh, how Griddle just makes me smile and stomp my foot. Prog rock without the elves, indeed.
RIP Robert Joseph, fellow musician. What happenned to ye? A heart attack at age 34? Why? Huh? What? Whaaaa...? No sense being made here.