Boys, wake up. Are you all blind?
Paris Hilton. For crying out loud to the heavens above.
She is not at all hot.
She is not at all cute.
She is not at all sexy.
The empress has no clothes. In this case, blllleeeaaachhhh.
She looks like an electroshocked mule.
She looks like she smells just like Ocean Beach SF at low tide in hot sunny September after the millions of dead jellyfish washed up the week before.
A molting goat in a patent leather leotard sucking down a six dollar burger. She probably got a lifetime supply from Carl's Jr., and with any luck she'll look like the Hindenberg in six months.
And if you actually plunked down money for "1 Night In Paris," your reservation on The Barge awaits impatiently. Rule #3: Try not to let brainless women steal your money. For me that's not such a problem; I don't know many brainless women, and I have no money. It works pretty nicely.
Ladies and gentlemen, please tell me I'm not alone in this. Won't someone rid us of that twatty no-talent cloth-eared shrew-cow hambeast-in-training? It'd be a good start anyway. I swear, if she decides to pick up a guitar/start a "band" I'll personally take one for the team and throttle her myself.
Posted by eric at June 2, 2005 02:02 AM